Wednesday, November 30, 2011

Some collected wisdom.

All changes, even the most longed for, have their melancholy; for what we leave behind us is a part of ourselves; we must die to one life before we can enter another.  ~Anatole France

Without accepting the fact that everything changes, we cannot find perfect composure.  But unfortunately, although it is true, it is difficult for us to accept it.  Because we cannot accept the truth of transience, we suffer.  ~Shunryu Suzuki
The man who looks for security, even in the mind, is like a man who would chop off his limbs in order to have artificial ones which will give him no pain or trouble.  ~Henry Miller
There is a certain relief in change, even though it be from bad to worse!  As I have often found in travelling in a stagecoach, that it is often a comfort to shift one's position, and be bruised in a new place.  ~Washington Irving
Time is a dressmaker specializing in alterations.  ~Faith Baldwin
You can avoid having ulcers by adapting to the situation:  If you fall in the mud puddle, check your pockets for fish.  ~Author Unknown
I put a dollar in one of those change machines.  Nothing changed.  ~George Carlin
We did not change as we grew older; we just became more clearly ourselves.  ~Lynn Hall
Those who expect moments of change to be comfortable and free of conflict have not learned their history.  ~Joan Wallach Scott
Continuity gives us roots; change gives us branches, letting us stretch and grow and reach new heights.  ~Pauline R. Kezer
If you would attain to what you are not yet, you must always be displeased by what you are.  For where you are pleased with yourself there you have remained.  Keep adding, keep walking, keep advancing.  ~Saint Augustine
We all have big changes in our lives that are more or less a second chance.  ~Harrison Ford
Pain is inevitable.  Suffering is optional.  ~M. Kathleen Casey
If you're going through hell, keep going.  ~Winston Churchill
We have no right to ask when sorrow comes, "Why did this happen to me?" unless we ask the same question for every moment of happiness that comes our way.  ~Author Unknown

A bend in the road is not the end of the road... unless you fail to make the turn.  ~Author Unknown
Turn your wounds into wisdom.  ~Oprah Winfrey
You may not realize it when it happens, but a kick in the teeth may be the best thing in the world for you.  ~Walt Disney
When the Japanese mend broken objects, they aggrandize the damage by filling the cracks with gold.  They believe that when something's suffered damage and has a history it becomes more beautiful.  ~Barbara Bloom (Dunno if it’s true but it’s a great sentiment)
I have sometimes been wildly, despairingly, acutely miserable, but through it all I still know quite certainly that just to be alive is a grand thing.  ~Agatha Christie
I believe there are more urgent and honorable occupations than the incomparable waste of time we call suffering.  ~Colette
Smooth seas do not make skillful sailors.  ~African Proverb
There is no education like adversity.  ~Disraeli
Adversity introduces a man to himself.  ~Author Unknown
Life didn't promise to be wonderful.  ~Teddy Pendergrass

Adversity is the first path to truth.  ~Lord Byron
The beauty of the world has two edges, one of laughter, one of anguish, cutting the heart asunder.  ~Virginia Woolf, A Room of One's Own, 1929
To have become a deeper man is the privilege of those who have suffered.  ~Oscar Wilde

Life is thickly sown with thorns, and I know no other remedy than to pass quickly through them.  The longer we dwell on our misfortunes, the greater is their power to harm us.  ~Voltaire
Shit happens, deal with it. Life never promised to be easy, expecting it to be easy is wrong. ~ Me
Life never throws us the easy balls: it’s always bottom of the ninth and you have one more strike and the pitcher just threw a fast curve ball. In the end all you can do is swing and hope and pray for the best. ~ Me again
Life expects us to make a tie breaking field goal from the 50 yard line, last few seconds of the second quarter, at the Super Bowl. ~ Me yet again
Yes I like sports analogies. 

Friday, October 28, 2011

Madonna

Why is Madonna one of, if not the greatest pop star that ever lived? Is it the gap in her teeth, her devil may care attitude toward critics, her relentless dedication to pop music, her shock value, her dance routines, or is it simply a combination of all of these things and then some? Pretty much. Madonna has been making hit records since the early 80s and has been an icon longer than I've been alive. And there is a good reason for this: she is amazing! Yes, I'm a big fan. Yes, I own several of her albums: 11 to be exact (1 concert, the 3 greatest hits compilations, 6 studio, and 1 soundtrack). And there are still some that I need to get.

Madonna.com lists her albums by type and the number is, a staggering, 25 albums (this includes compilations, soundtracks, and remix albums) They exclude the concert recording of The Confessions Tour under the live albums but it was bundled with a concert video so it's understandable. Her site also lists her singles: 69 of them.  According to her Wikipedia page, she has 75 singles considering the fact that her website left off any singles from Hard Candy, I'm likely to believe that number to be slightly closer to the actual number of singles she has released. Again according to her Wikipedia page, Hard Candy was her 37th Billboard Hot 100 top ten hit. She has had 11 number one singles on the main chart and 39 number one dance over the span of 26 years. In comparison, Cher has made 25 albums, 76 singles (in a 46-year span), and only 4 number one singles, 1 number one dance single, and 9 number one club singles. Lady GaGa has had 16 singles I cannot find officially how many have been number one hits (pretty much all of them). She has done three albums in my opinion (fame monster is a separate album form the fame). Britney Spears has released 7 studio albums, 4 compilations, and 37 singles. According to her Wikipedia discography only 4 of them made number one status, I know that a lot more of her singles made number one slots just no official data. Christina Aguilera has released 6 studio albums, 1 compilation, 30 singles, and 4 of those singles hit number one. P!nk has released 5 studio albums, 1 live, 2 compilations, and had 26 singles, which 3 hit number one. Kylie Minogue has made 11 studio albums, 4 live, and 9 compilation albums and 51 singles. Only 4 of her singles have been charted in the US and all 4 hit number one on the US dance chart.  Now all of the chart information and number of albums is from Wikipedia so if you know better or have better sources please step up with them.

With all of the album nonsense out of the way, it becomes clear that Madonna has made more than all of the rest excluding Cher but she has been recording longer. Furthermore, more of Madonna's singles have hit number one on the mainstream as well as the dance charts. Now besides her prowess at making albums and topping charts. There remains the issue of who has sold more. According to the Guinness Book of World Records, she has sold 275 million albums making her the hands-down winner.

Now beyond record sales and hits remains the actual talent portion. She definitely has a certain amount of talent:













And finally, the video that endeared Madge to me even more, even though I love hydrangeas: 





Basically, love her or hate her she is the greatest female, hell, the greatest pop star that has ever been. Lady GaGa is the only one of the new batch of pop stars, aka anybody post-1997, that can rival Madonna for her star power. Then again Madonna is slowly starting to slip further and further from the center of focus in today's ever-increasing world of pop music. Hopefully her new album due out next year will push her back into Public focus. 

Now bear with me for a few minutes longer. I love all of the pop stars mentioned in this post. I have neglected to mention a few like Katy Perry, Beyonce, Rihanna, etc. mostly because we know that they have serious star power. Katy Perry and Rihanna are great talents but they don't really possess the type of star power that is needed to rival Madonna and they have yet to become legends so they must wait until they develop further or have a bigger catalog. Beyonce is slipping, her star power is fading fast. Her last few albums have been rather lackluster to say the least and besides she is technically an R&B Singer, not a pop star so there. 

Yes, Britney has fallen from pop grace but Femme Fatale is a very strong pop album and as long as she stays on top of the trends she may actually be able to take on GaGa in the near future instead of appearing on a Rihanna track as a guest vocalist for a remix.

Christina still has it her voice is still stellar and her songs are uber crap. I mean they make Britney songs sound good some times and that is saying something. However, the songs that Sia wrote for Christina on Bionic are stellar. 

P!nk, yeah she is still freaking awesome, and she could get to where Madonna is but I think she is more likely to quit and form a punk band before she could.

 Kylie is, well, not international enough to really do any major sales outside of Europe, Australia, and New Zealand. She every few years has an album that does well here in the US and occasionally in Asia but after that, it's years again until she has any success. Fever was the last album she had that really did anything in the US before the release of Aphrodite and Fever was released in 2002. 

GaGa is by and far more likely to beat Madonna at her own game than any of the other girls, mostly because she is a 21st (maybe 23rd) century Madonna on steroids. She has given up even pretending anymore and keeps making allusions to Madonna. 

So yeah this pretty much details why Madonna is so freaking awesome and so on and so forth. 

Tuesday, October 25, 2011

102 Songs

That is correct there are currently 102 songs on my "fav songs" playlist.  Even with a busy college schedule one must take time to listen to music. These songs are a mixture of current favorites and constant favorites. And no I did not type this list. Hopefully most of these people you know if not enjoy getting to listen to some new music even if it's old. ; )

  1. What a Feeling (Radio Edit) [feat. Kelly Rowland]: Alex Gaudino
  2. Boogie Woogie Bugle Boy: The Andrews Sisters
  3. In Love for a While (Radio Version): Anna Rossinelli
  4. Little Bird: Annie Lennox
  5. Walking On Broken Glass: Annie Lennox
  6. No More "I Love You's": Annie Lennox
  7. Shining Light: Annie Lennox
  8. All the Same to Me: Anya Marina
  9. Make My Body Rock: Ari Gold
  10. Mr. Mistress: Ari Gold
  11. Where the Music Takes You: Ari Gold
  12. Don't Rain On My Parade:  Barbra Streisand
  13. Come Together: The Beatles
  14. I Wrote the Book: Beth Ditto
  15. Crystalline: Björk
  16. Moon: Björk
  17. Virus: Björk
  18. Copy & Paste: BoA
  19. Don't Know What to Say: BoA
  20. I Wanna Go: Britney Spears
  21. How I Roll: Britney Spears
  22. Big Fat Bass (feat. will.i.am): Britney Spears
  23. Up n' Down: Britney Spears
  24. Fuck You: Cee Lo Green
  25. I Want Your Sex: Chris Mann
  26. It Gets Better : Chris Salvatore
  27. Fighter: Christina Aguilera
  28. Stronger than Ever: Christina Aguilera
  29. Jar of Hearts: Christina Perri
  30. You Make Me Feel...(Feat. Sabi): Cobra Starship
  31. Gay Pirates: Cosmo Jarvis
  32. Dreams: The Cranberries
  33. Linger : The Cranberries
  34. Crawling Back to You: Daughtry
  35. Long Way: Daughtry
  36. What Have We Become: Daughtry
  37. On the Inside : Daughtry
  38. Fit Right In: Deborah Harry
  39. Roll To Me: Del Amitri
  40. Personal Jesus: Depeche Mode
  41. In the Dark: Dev
  42. Let's Call the Whole Thing Off: Ella Fitzgerald & Louis Armstrong
  43. Changed The Way You Kiss Me (Mensah Remix): Example
  44. Follow You Down: Gin Blossoms
  45. River Deep, Mountain High (Glee Cast Version): Glee Cast
  46. Baobei (Chinese Baby): Jason Chen MiniAchilles
  47. Don't Wanna Go Home: Jason Derulo
  48. Leave It All Behind: Jason Walker
  49. Do It Like a Dude: Jessie J
  50. Abracadabra: Jessie J
  51. Who's Laughing Now: Jessie J
  52. Who You Are: Jessie J
  53. Just In Love: Joe Jonas
  54. Too Little, Too Late: JoJo
  55. Dancing Tonight: Kat DeLuna
  56. Drop It Low: Kat Deluna
  57. Caught In The Crowd: Kate Miller-Heidke
  58. Last Friday Night (T.G.I.F.) [Explicit]: Katy Perry
  59. Peacock [Explicit]: Katy Perry
  60. There She Goes: The La's
  61. Nothing Really Matters: Madonna
  62. Sky Fits Heaven: Madonna
  63. W T F: Matt Zarley
  64. What The Hell: Michael Henry & Justin Robinett
  65. Dancing Crazy: Miranda Cosgrove
  66. Oui Mais... Non: Mylène Farmer
  67. Lonely Lisa: Mylène Farmer
  68. Don't Forget Me: Neko Case
  69. You Get What You Give: New Radicals
  70. Ocean : Nick Hagelin
  71. People Go Wild: Nick Hagelin
  72. Super Bass [Explicit]: Nicki Minaj
  73. Don't Hold Your Breath: Nicole Scherzinger
  74. Heartbreak Down: P!nk
  75. Cooter!: Pandora Boxx
  76. Who's My B**ch: Paradiso Girls
  77. This City (feat. Lupe Fiasco): Patrick Stump
  78. Love Etc.: Pet Shop Boys
  79. Hush Hush; Hush Hush: The Pussycat Dolls
  80. S&M: Rihanna
  81. What's My Name?: Rihanna
  82. We Found Love (feat. Calvin Harris): Rihanna
  83. Moving On (Naked Version): Sarah Dawn Finer
  84. Naturally: Selena Gomez & the Scene
  85. Love You Like A Love Song: Selena Gomez & The Scene
  86. All For You: Sister Hazel
  87. Little Miss Can't Be Wrong: Spin Doctors
  88. Not Gonna Get Us: t.A.T.u.
  89. All The Things She Said: t.A.T.u.
  90. How Soon Is Now?: t.A.T.u.
  91. You Belong With Me: Taylor Swift
  92. Mean: Taylor Swift
  93. Where We Belong: Thriving Ivory
  94. Great DJ: The Ting Tings
  95. Shut Up and Let Me Go: The Ting Tings
  96. Wordy Rappinghood (Evian Mix): Uffie
  97. Love Reign O'er Me: The Who
  98. With Love Baby: Witloof Bay
  99. Heads Will Roll: Yeah Yeah Yeahs
  100. Is It True? (Eurovision Iceland 2009 Orginal Remix): Yohanna
  101. I Am the Best (내가 제일 잘 나가): 2NE1
  102. What's Up: 4 Non Blondes


Monday, October 17, 2011

Random post about acne

I'll confess that we all have bad skin days especially those of us that are just finally escaping the grasp of lord puberty. Ah, the days of waking up to find hair somewhere new and my voice a full octave lower are almost a distant memory. Evidently lord puberty's friend the earl of acne has planned on living the next few years on the face of many unwashed Americans though. I'm 21 and still have occasional break outs but far less frequently and not as bad as when I was in my teens because I switched to an organic soap, eat better, try and sleep more, bathe regularly, and in general my hormones have leveld out, well for the most part. As Xander Harris said in episode 14 of season 2 of Buffy: "I'm 17. Looking at linoleum makes me wanna have sex."Pretty much doesn't change for a long time.

Anyway back to zits. I understand most of us can't help them, they just happen. One day we are like, wow I have skin, and next day wow, I have zits. That would be when 16 year old girls beg their mothers to get them Proactive. I never used proactive, I used Dial bar soap. It did the trick for a long time but finally at around 18 my skin got behind just needing anti-bacterial soap. So I did the next logical thing of buying Oxy pads. If you don't know what these are, they are an acne treatment that comes on this little moist cotton like pads and are very inexpensive at Walmart and Fred Meyers (Kroger) and other places that sell skin treatments. The main active ingredient in Oxy pads is Salicylic acid (about .5% per pad). I used this one (which has 2% salicylic acid per pad) once and it really messed up my face because I have sensitive skin (don't we all) and always had light acne: something with this much salicylic acid really burned my skin. These products do work, for a while. How they work is quite simple: every time you use one it acts as a small chemical peel (same main ingredient, it is just a much smaller dose) and takes longer to see the affects. Now, they didn't get rid of my acne permanently but I a saw an almost immediate decrease in pimples and black heads. Long term results were that my face was always super shiny because the skin was being peeled off revealing newer, younger, fresher skin, and if I stopped treatment because it was drying out my skin (also contains trace amounts of benzoyl peroxide and some rubbing alcohol) leaving flaking and slight chemical burns, I would have another break out that was often worse than the original one I was treating. I ended up using it on the black heads on my nose and when I had a few zits pop up I would hit them with a pad and call it good. I eventually gave up using the pads all together and switched to using Dial on my face and an exfoliating shower scrub by Axe. Eventually I found that the dial soap was increasing my break outs because it was a communal bar of soap. So I was scrubbing my face with everyone else's hair and body oil. Duh, my skin was breaking out! I was putting more dirt on than I was taking off. Finally, about a year ago my sister gave me part of a bar of soap that she had bought from a seller on Etsy.com (click on the link to be taken to the soap). This is the seller's description of the product:

"This is a gentle and conditioning bar of soap made with skin-loving ingredients. Activated charcoal helps to unclog pores, remove impurities and excess oils, and detoxify the skin. Evening primrose oil is rich in vitamins and minerals, and works to repair damaged skin while softening and smoothing. Jojoba oil is a penetrating moisturizer that is similar to our skin’s own natural oils, and is rich in proteins and minerals. A combination of olive oil, grapeseed oil, and castor oil attracts moisture and nourishes the skin. Shea butter and cocoa butter work to soften, soothe, and improve skin flexibility. Coconut oil is easily absorbed by the skin, and creates an incredible lather, while palm kernel oil ensures a long-lasting bar of soap. This soap is scented with an herbaceous combination of eucalyptus and rosemary essential oils which also help to repair and renew the skin."


It really works. I have seen a decrease in acne and black heads. The pads made my pours larger to get the dirt oil and impurities out. My skin has been permanently damaged by using Oxy products. Luckily I used them infrequently enough that the damage is minor and it did not result in cystic acne: some companies and dermatologist, as well as skin obsessed older sisters claim that using products like Oxy frequently for extended periods of time can lead to cystic acne because the pours never close causing more junk to get caught in them. The best part of this soap is that it is all natural. All of the ingredients are used constantly in homeopathic acne treatments as well as morsturizers and other skin treatments to achieve "healthier  and more youthful skin." It works marvels and can be used on more than just the face. My most troubled area forever was my back: I hate backne! You can't pop 'em so one day you move and they pop and ruin your favorite pale blue t-shirt. Since using this soap I only have occasional brake outs and that is usually when I go for an extended time without showering or I get very dirty. Also, using an organic shampoo and conditioner on my hair keeps my hair cleaner causing less dirt and oil from my hair to get on my skin. Another way to keep acne off your face is too keep your hair out of your face. Which means, either shorter hair or keeping your bangs out of your face. Good luck scene kids.

Men are very bad about taking care of their skin. Especially celebrity men. Y'all make ass loads of money and evidently don't know how to tell your personal assistant to buy a bottle of Clean and Clear or to call a dermatologist that does house calls. Admittedly most guys are like whatever it will go away on it's own. Evidently not. Acne is not just a teen thing, it often plagues people well into their 30s sometimes even their 40s or 50s. So it is something that has to be taken care and it is often as simple as changing your diet and washing your face every morning and night. I know that is so much work but it's your skin, your bodies largest organ, and it's with you for life so take care of it.

Monday, September 26, 2011

Stuff you can't make up.

 I'm in college and living in an apartment on campus. Two of my three roommates are international students so there are a lot of interesting conversations about English word and phrase usage. Last night, while cleaning up my room, I overheard a conversation between my two foreign roommates about the connotations of the words wish and hope: 

Roommate 1: Wish is always negative and hope is always positive.
Roommate 2: Uh-huh
Me: giggle snort in disbelief.
Roommate 1: Like saying I wish I could do something means that you can't do it.
Me: ok, sounds reasonable and is a true usage.
Roommate 2: Ohhhh
Roommate 1: Yeah, and hope is always good. So saying you wish someone's child grows up without sickness is saying you want that kid to get sick. (Very much so paraphrased)
Me: Trying desperately not to laugh my ass off right about now.
Roommate 2: Uh-huh
 
Basically, I couldn't compose my self enough to contradict what he said and I had to hide in my room because I was laughing so hard. May I iterate for those of you who might now be rather fuzzy on the usage and cultural meaning of wish and hope that this above example and explanation are mostly false. Wish can have a negative connotation but is purely based on usage. For example, using the phrase "Yeah, I wish," or "You wish" are typically negative because of the sarcastic tone that often accompanies these phrases: just like "In your dreams"or "Not a chance" etcetera. In the case above, the use of wish in the instance of saying that one wishes good health for a child is, of course, only negative if accompanied by sarcastic body language or a sarcastic tone of voice. Most english words can be made negative in the same way. Just be careful out there and be sure to talk to native English speakers in the country you live in as well as people that speak your language and have spoken English and lived in an English speaking country for a long time: like at least 5 or 6 years. 

Thursday, September 8, 2011

Interesting New Talent

Ok, I'll admit it, I like Country music. However, I am kinda picky about what Country music I listen to, and the selection process is pretty intense (I listen to a few samples on iTunes then decide if I like it or not). So, to my utter shock, I found a weirdly talented 17 year old on iTunes, and was like OMG, he is 17? If you haven't guessed already, I'm talking about Scotty McCreery. He evidently was a contestant on American Idol last year (didn't watch, didn't care) and he has released his first none American Idol single, The Trouble With Girls. Haven't listened to the song all the way through yet, but he could be singing the names of communicable diseases and I'd still be like, wow! He is 17 and has this perfect baritone voice that I've never heard out of someone so young before, which evidently if your voice is pitched in this range you can only be a country singer.  Admittedly, singing Country anymore doesn't require an incredible amount of talent: you don't have to yodel, or have a huge range, or even be able to sing on key; these things do help, except maybe the yodeling. I mean, Reba McEntire, Martina McBride, Trisha Yearwood, and Leanne Rhimes can all belt out the high notes and have amazing vocal ranges, but most male Country singers don't have to sing more than a few chords half way decent. So, Scotty doesn't have much of a range; but, the range he has is pretty freaking amazing for someone his age. Now in 10 years, he'll be passé so we may not even need to worry about his staying power, but country fans tend to hold onto their fave singers long past their prime. I mean look at Willie Nelson, the man can't carry a tune without a bucket anymore, but people still pay to see him in concert and buy his albums (I'm not sure if he has released an album of new music in the last few years). Anyway, random ramblings aside, if you have found any part of country you like check out Scotty McCreery, he is a pretty cool singer, if crappy music: kinda synonymous with Country anymore. Scotty good luck in your future endeavors and do your best with what time you have in the spotlight.

Saturday, July 2, 2011

First story I've finished



This is the first story that I've finished and I'm rather happy with it. The only warning I'll give is that it contains some nudity, violence, and brief strong language.

Pink Begonias

“Hey, wait, stop, you forgot something,” Chris yelled as he ran after the mysterious woman with red hair.
She was walking fast and was already a block ahead of him. He could see her black umbrella bobbing through the crowd as she walked. After chasing her for four and a half blocks. His wiry legs were aching from running in his suede oxfords. He decided that running in oxfords on wet sidewalks was something he would never do again. As he ran, the heavy rain soaked through his suit making his shirt cling to his thin chest. 
The red-headed woman turned a corner, Chris followed running as fast as he could through the crowd. His thick brown hair stuck to his brow and dripped rain down his face. His suit, thoroughly soaked, weighed heavily on his shoulders. He rarely wore suits, he only wore it today because he had an interview at the Morning Star. He knew that he would never make that interview if he continued chasing this woman. He began thinking that maybe he should just stop at the police station and drop the woman’s purse off. It looked expensive. The purse was real alligator, bright red, and was obviously designer: even fashion ignorant Chris could see that. He rounded the corner that the woman had turned and could see that she was only a few yards ahead. 
“HEY LADY, WAIT,” he yelled. 
She stopped and turned. Chris ran until he was about five feet from her and stopped. His mouth hung open in both exhaustion and awe. She was the most beautiful woman he had ever seen, flawless pale skin, small nose, large green eyes, long-thick eyelashes coated with dark black mascara, a perfect rosebud mouth painted red, and the perfect Marilyn Monroe hourglass figure. She wore a tan trench coat, a floral scarf, and bright red patent leather pumps. 
“Ummm, uh, you left this on the train ma’am,” Chris finally managed to stammer as he shoved the purse at the beautiful woman.
“Why thank you,” the woman said with a sophisticated southern accent. 
Chris imagined her dressed as Scarlet O’Hara descending the staircase at Tara. 
“I guess I owe you a reward for being such a gentleman, running five blocks and all just to return my purse,” she said with a seductive smile and a look of innocence that made Chris think things one shouldn’t think about complete strangers.
“It was nothing, really,” Chris said, blushing and thrusting his hands deep in his trouser pockets. 
“Oh but you ran so far and your suit is wet and your shoes are ruined and I bet you had an important meeting to get to.” She said with a grin and a slight tone of condescending sarcasm that Chris missed. 
“I didn’t have anywhere important to be,” Chris said as his blush deepened. 
“Really, you are such a fine young gentleman.”
 Chris blushed more if that was even possible. 
“At least come to my house and dry off.” She said seductively. 
“Really?” He said as his voiced cracked. 
He had graduated college a month ago but his voice still cracked every now and again. “Really, my house is just up ahead and it’s the least I can do for such a nice young man as yourself.” She said sweetly. 
“Umm, ok, if you are sure it’s no trouble,” Chris said politely. 
“Of course it’s no trouble, I just love to entertain,” she said. 
“Would you mind holding the umbrella so we can both walk under it,” She asked coyly. Chris gulped like a cartoon character, “Sure.” 
He grabbed the umbrella and held it over both their heads and walked on the outside as any gentleman would. She put the bag on her wrist and looped her arm through his. They walked for a few minutes in silence. 
“Here’s where I live,” She announced. 
They stood in front of a beautiful townhouse with a red door. They approached the door and she fished her keys out of her bag. With a graceful sweep of her hand, she unlocked the door. She walked into the front hall.
 “Come on in out of the rain,” she beckoned seductively. 
As Chris stepped through the doorway, She removed her trench coat revealing a black silk dress that hugged her curves seductively. Chris’s mouth fell open in amazement.  Overhead, an ornate chandelier hung in the hall making the beautiful woman’s red hair glow. The woman sashayed down the hall towards a staircase, her red pumps clicking on the hardwood floors. 
“Wait here, I’ll go get you a towel and something dry to wear.” She purred. 
“What?” Chris asked stupidly. 
“You can’t stay in those wet clothes,” She reasoned. 
“Ummm, why not,” Chris asked shyly drawing his jacket tightly across his chest. 
“Why not? “One you’ll catch your death in those wet clothes, two you are dripping all over my floors and I’m not about to let a dripping, shivering, diseased ridden man sit on my white sofa,” she teased. 
Chris looked at the widening puddle he was standing in.
 “Oh gosh, I’m sorry ma’am, I’m so sorry. “If you get me a towel or something I’ll dry this up right away.” 
She smiled, and began to climb the stairs, “That’s exactly what I was planning on doing.” 
Chris blushed at his own stupidity. 
While alone, Chris decided to examine his surroundings a little. He looked up and down the illuminated hallway at the pictures and paintings lining the hall. A console table sat against the left wall with a large vase filled with pink begonias placed in the center, with small crystal and silver curios arranged at the base. Everything seemed normal but extremely expensive. 
He heard her footsteps as she approached the staircase. She gracefully descended the stairs. 
“Here you go,” she handed him a towel that had a navy blue silk robe with white piping along the lapel folded neatly on top of it. 
“The robe should fit you, it’s a gift for my brother back in Georgia and he’s about your size, maybe a little taller.” 
“Um, thanks,” Chris said. 
He stood at the base of the stairs looking at her. 
“Well, aren’t you going to change,” she asked. 
“Right here, in front of you?” Chris blurted out bashfully. 
“Sure, I don’t care I’ve seen many men naked you don’t have anything I haven’t seen before, at least I hope not,” She said flirtatiously. 
Chris turned a shade of red not too dissimilar to a fire engine, “I, um, I can’t change in front of you, It wouldn’t be proper, we haven’t been properly introduced, not that, that would allow me to change in front of you...,” Chris rambled. 
“Oh my, I’m just forgetting everything today, first my purse now my manners, my name is Charlotte. “And what is yours?” 
“Ummm, Chris,” he stammered. 
“Chris, that’s a good name for you, you look exactly like a Chris, is it short for Christian or Christopher,” Charlotte asked with a slight toss of her red hair. 
“Uhh, it’s just Chris,” he replied shyly. 
“Really, huh, I’ve never met just a Chris before, it’s always been short for something,” Charlotte said thoughtfully. 
“Anyway, you’re still dripping and shivering, so go change,” she said maternally.
“But,” Chris started. 
“No buts, there is a powder room right behind you, you can change in there, and I promise I won’t peek,” Charlotte said teasingly. 
Chris went into the small room and began taking his clothes off. As he began to take his pants off, the door creaked open causing Chris to jump and bump into the wall making a terrible racket. 
“Are you ok in there honey,” asked the disembodied manicured hand of Charlotte. “Yeah, I’m uh fine,” Chris said sheepishly. 
“Well, that’s a comfort at least, hand me your wet things and I’ll start getting them dry,” Charlotte offered. 
Chris slid his pants down and handed them, his shirt, and coat to her. Charlotte examined Chris’ clothes. 
“Umm, Chris?” 
“Yes,” replied Chris. 
“Darling, are you sure you gave me everything,” Charlotte asked with a bemused air of concern in her voice. 
“What do you mean,” asked Chris confused. 
“Just checking, ‘cause I have a coat, a shirt, and a pair of trousers here, and umm, how do I put this delicately, are you going commando,” Charlotte asked. 
Chris turned bright red, “Why do you ask?” 
“Well, judging by the dampness of your trousers I’d say that anything under them is just as likely to be sopping wet,” Charlotte reasoned. 
Chris looked down at his white briefs that had become translucent and cemented to his body, his last remaining item of clothing. He thought whether it was better to catch a cold from wearing extremely wet undergarments or to be pretty much naked in front of Charlotte. 
The manicured hand reemerged into the tiny bathroom with the index finger forming a hook. “Chris, I can hear you thinking all the way out here, quit thinking about it and hand ‘em over,” Charlotte prodded. 
Chris starred at the hand. Finally, he cautiously slid his briefs off and hooked the waistband delicately on her finger. 
“Don’t you feel better already,” Charlotte asked. 
“Not really,” Chris said uncomfortably.
 Charlotte laughed, “You’ll feel better once you’re dry and warm, and I’ll have your things taken care of. “Once you've dried off and have the robe on, go sit in front of the fire in the living room,” Charlotte instructed. 
“Uhh, ok,” Chris said self-consciously as he caught his reflection in the full-length mirror on the back of the door. 
Chris dried himself with the towel, then slid the robe on and firmly tied the belt around his slender waist. He opened the door and stepped out into the hall as he dried his ears and spied the housekeeper mopping up his puddles. He apologized for the mess, then went into the living room. The room was decorated with a mixture of antique and modern furniture. The wall separating the living room and the hall was lined mahogany bookcases filled with books and antique curios. There were two large white sofas sitting across from each other in the center of the room. At the far end of the sofas were two end tables each with a vase filled with pink begonias perched on top of them. The walls were painted a warm tan with white trim. The living room was in the front of the house and at the front of the room was a large window overlooking the street. Outside of the window, was a flower box overflowing with large pink begonias. Under the window, sat a comfortable looking white chez lounge, with a crimson cashmere throw neatly draped across it. Chris moved towards the fireplace and positioned himself on an ottoman in front of it close enough to warm him. He heard Charlotte walking down the hall. She spoke softly with the housekeeper, then entered the room. She glided gracefully across the room and sat on the sofa across from Chris and crossed her legs exposing a small amount of her thigh.
 “Feeling better,” Charlotte asked.
 “Umm yes, yes I am, thank you,” Chris replied with half a smile. 
The housekeeper entered the room with a large silver tray with a delicate white bone china tea service decorated with pink begonias. She set the tray carefully on the table then returned to the kitchen. 
“What do you take in your tea,” Charlotte asked in her smooth and sultry voice, as she poured him a cup of tea. 
“Um, just two sugars,” Chris replied quietly. 
“Just two sugars for just Chris,” Charlotte said teasingly and added two cubes of sugar to his tea.
 She stirred his tea fluidly then handed it to him. She then prepared a cup for herself. 
“Would you like some sandwiches,” She asked while offering a plate full of small sandwiches to Chris. 
“Yes ma’am, I would,” Chris said hungrily. 
Charlotte set her cup down on the table forcefully and said with a whimper, “Oh Chris now you’ve gone and hurt my feelings.” 
With a confused and frantic tone in his voice, Chris said, “I’m sorry, did I do something wrong?” 
“Yes you did, you keep calling me ma’am, which makes me feel like an old woman, please just call me Charlotte,” She said with a slight whimper. 
“I’m sorry, Charlotte I didn’t mean to offend you,” Chris said apologetically and shifted from the ottoman in front of the fire to sit next to Charlotte on the sofa. 
“That’s better,” Charlotte said cheerfully. 
After a few minutes, Charlotte flirtatiously asked, “Do you want to see something, Chris?” 
“Sure,” Chris replied happily. 
“Good, finish your tea and I’ll show it to you,” Charlotte said seductively. 
Chris swallowed his sandwich and gulped his tea down as Charlotte sipped her tea delicately. 
“All finished,” Charlotte asked. 
Chris nodded. 
“Excellent, come with me,” Charlotte purred. 
She stood up and took Chris’ hand and led him out into the hall. They walked towards the stairs at the end of the hall. As they walked, the hallway seemed to grow longer to Chris, then it began to become fuzzy and shaky all around the edges. He shut his eyes to try to regain his focus, he then felt a numbness in his arms and a cold draft on his genitals. He opened his eyes and saw nothing but darkness. 
“Chris honey, are you awake,” Charlotte asked.
 “Um, yeah, I think so,” Chris replied, “But I can’t see anything.” 
“Oh, I’m sorry honey you should be able to see what’s going on shouldn’t you,” Charlotte said sympathetically. 
Chris heard a click and was blinded for a minute. He attempted to shield his eyes from the brightness of the light with his hands, but when he tried to move his arms he couldn’t. He opened his eyes wider, filled with panic, he looked at where his arms were and realized they were strapped down. He twisted his arms and legs trying to break free but couldn’t, the leather restraints were too strong for him to get loose. He was lying on a table, his arms and legs were strapped down at forty-five-degree angles.
 “I’m naked,” Chris exclaimed nervously. 
Charlotte laughed and stepped out of the shadows. She was wearing medical scrubs with her hair pulled neatly back into a ponytail.
 “Honey you need to get your priorities straight, I wouldn’t be as concerned about being naked, as I would be with the fact that I was strapped to a table in a soundproof basement, with a woman who happens to be dressed like a surgeon and oh are those surgical tools on the left side of the table?” 
Chris frantically turned his head and saw a surgical cart with several shining surgical instruments on it. 
“What are you going to do with those,” Chris asked frenziedly. 
“Oh these,” Charlotte said cheerfully, “I’m gonna see what makes you tick, Chris.” 
“You’re insane,” Chris exclaimed wildly. 
 “Oh Chris baby, you shouldn’t say things like that to a lady. “I almost hate to do it to you, but in the end, you’re a man and all men may at some point seem like they are different and they won’t hurt you or break your heart or worse, but all men are the same no matter how nice they seem. “So, I guess you’re just going to have to go the way of the ones that have preceded you.” 
“Why are you doing this to me,” Chris screamed desperately.
“Ooooh, good question Chris, well let’s see you have a penis right?” 
“Yes,” Chris answered feverishly. 
“Yes, what Chris, yes you have what,” Charlotte demanded in a crazed tone of voice. “Yes, I have a goddamned penis,” Chris screamed hysterically. 
“Oh my Chris what language you use, I thought you were a nice boy, oh but you can’t be that nice of a boy if you use that kind of language,” Charlotte scolded. 
“I’m sorry, it’s just that I’m, it’s just that I’m,” Chris stumbled hysterically. 
“It’s just that you’re what, what are you feeling right now Chris, tell me dammit,” Charlotte demanded. 
“I’m fucking scared,” Chris screamed, tears welling up in his eyes. 
“Scared, Chris you’re only scared, oh that won’t do I don’t want you to just be scared Chris I want much more than that.” 
Charlotte picked up a scalpel and held it in front of Chris’ face. 
“You see this Chris, this is a scalpel. “Now it’s not just any scalpel, this is the best-goddamned scalpel money can buy.”
She took the scalpel and thrust it through the back of his left hand causing dark crimson red blood to pour from his hand. Chris screamed so loud Charlotte wondered if anybody may have heard it. This thought soon passed when she heard Chris crying. 
“What do you feel now Chris, hmmm, what is your current emotion, tell Charlotte, please.”
 “Oh god, it hurts,” Chris cried out. 
“I didn’t ask HOW it felt, I want to know what your current emotion is,” Charlotte demanded, and gave the scalpel a quick twist. 
Chris screamed again, “I’m terrified, oh god, I’m gonna die, oh god!” 
“You are so much smarter than any of the others, you already know you’re going to die, that’s fabulous,” Charlotte said giddily. 
“I’ve never dealt with a man like you Chris, you really are amazing,” Charlotte complemented. 
“Most try to beg their way out of this, but you have just resigned your self to your fate, I like that. “Now don’t get the wrong idea, it’s not gonna be quick and it’s gonna hurt like hell, maybe even worse, don’t really know seeing as how I’ve never been to hell,” Charlotte said with a giggle.
“Now you asked a serious question why am I doing this to you, that right?” 
Chris nodded and said, “Yes ma’am.”
“Oh good, even in the face of extremely painful torture you still have manners, I like that,” Charlotte said with a smile. 
“Anyway, back to the topic at hand, I am doing this because as we covered earlier you have a penis which makes you are male. “Men have done things to me that you can never even begin to imagine or understand. “Even as different as you seem and nice as you appear, you are just a male that is driven by your penis. “Hell, I bet that when you walked through my door earlier today you thought you were going to get lucky. “A gentleman would have deposited me safely on my doorstep, bid me a good day, then gone about his business. “So you see, you did this to yourself.” 
Chris was crying very hard now, intermingled with muffled curse words and pleas for release. 
“Oh Chris baby, don’t cry so much it makes my job so much harder, I’m actually starting to feel sorry for you and we can’t have that now, can we? “Please make it easier for me honey and don’t cry,” Charlotte asked. 
Chris continued to cry.
 “Ok sweetheart, I asked nicely and you didn’t, so you know what that means, I have to give you a reason to cry. “Let’s see should I castrate you now or later, hmmm, decisions, decisions. “Got an opinion sexy or are you going make me decide all by myself?”
Chris turned his head toward Charlotte, tears in his eyes, “Please, don’t.” 
“Don’t castrate you, ok, you’re the boss, I won’t castrate you....now. “Oh Chris, don’t cry you’re balls are going to a better place, my shelf. “Yup, I keep them as souvenirs, in jars, pickled no less, kinda weird really, don’t you think?” 
Charlotte walked around to where she could get a better look at Chris’ genitals.
“I kinda hate to break up the set, you have such a pretty little penis, well as pretty as one of those can be, they’re all kind of ugly and sausage like.” 
Charlotte shuddered, “Why y’all are so attached to them I’ll never know. “Maybe you know, tell me, Chris, why do men love their penises so much?” 
“I don’t know,” Chris screamed wildly, “I don’t fucking know, you crazy bitch.”
 “Oh, Chris you ought not to have said that. “Now you have to pay the penalty for using such bad language.”
Charlotte picked up another scalpel, walked around to the other side of the table, and forcefully drove it down into the flesh of his right thigh, with careful accuracy to make sure that she missed the artery so he would not bleed out until she was done. Chris screamed out in pain as blood ran down his thigh pooling onto the clean white sheet he was lying on. 
“Oooh, that was a good one, that one hit bone I bet, I love it when that happens.” 
Chris breaths were coming shallower and quicker. 
Charlotte walked back to her instruments and began arranging them, “Chris dear, you have to breathe better than that. “We can’t have you hyperventilating then passing out in the middle of the fun now can we?” 
Chris continued to breathe frenetically.
 “Ok Chris, It’s ok, you’re doing fine, you need to calm down honey, ok, listen to my breathing.” Charlotte soothed and began to breathe louder at a very regulated pace. “Would you like to listen to some music, I think that might help you,” Charlotte said soothingly. She picked a remote up off the surgical tray and pressed the play button and soothing classical music gently filled the room. 
“Ah, that’s better. “Now I can think better, how about you is that better?” 
Chris looked at Charlotte with tear and panic filled eyes. 
“It’s okay honey,” Charlotte soothed and stroked Chris’ hair. 
“It’ll be over shortly, I like you, so I’ll make you a deal, it really can’t be beaten. “You scream your head off and I’ll kill you after a couple of hours, hows that?” 
Chris looked at Charlotte with terror in his eyes, simpering with fright. 
“I thought so, let’s begin. “Now the real fun begins,” Charlotte said with a malicious smile. 


Monday, April 18, 2011

Brief Bio on Pyotr Ilyich Tchaikovsky

Pyotr Ilyich Tchaikovsky was born on May 7, 1840 in Votkinsk, and died on November 6, 1893 in St. Petersburg at 53 years of age. Tchaikovsky’s family had a long history of military service. His father had served in the military as an engineer and was later appointed to oversee an iron mine in Votkinsk. Tchaikovsky began his formal education at the school of Jurisprudence in St. Petersburg at the age of 10. He was to become a civil servant despite his musical inclination. At the age of 19, he graduated and began his short lived civil service career at the Ministry of Justice. He worked there for three years and his highest promotion was to senior assitant. Tchaikovsky would later abandoned his career at the Ministry of Justice to persue his passion for music fully. The Russian Music Society (RMS) was founded in 1859, the year he began working as a civil servant. He would begin taking lessons in music through the RMS in his leisure time. By 1863, he abandoned his career and began pursuing music and in 1865, Tchaikovsky graduated from the St.Petersburg Conservatory. He would spend the rest of his life composing some of the most critically acclaimed music to ever be produced by a Russian. He was dissimilar to many of his contemporaries in Russian because his music was not nationalistic. His music has a definite Western quality to it and was praised for it. Tchaikovsky received much notoriety, fame, and wealth during his life. There is still a great deal of mystery and speculation about his personal life. For example, his sexuality, his younger brother, Modest, published a three volume biography, which has been criticized for the carful censoring of any material dealing with Tchaikovsky’s homosexual love affairs. Modest is excused for his censorship because he is believed to have been protecting his brother’s and his reputation and hiding his own homosexuality. Unfortunately the speculation on Tchaikovsky’s sexuality, has often times overshadowed his great musical accomplishments for notoriety in recent times.

Wednesday, March 30, 2011

My Eurovision top 11

For the past 54 years or so, the member nations of the EBU (European Broadcasting Union) send their best pop singers and songs to compete against each other to be declared the best. This competition known as Eurovision is the longest running tv show and is one of the most watched programs in Europe. Each year many countries send awesome songs but most are utter crap. For more information on the contest itself check out their site. This year the contest will be held in Düsseldorf Germany. In the final round of the competition 25 songs/singers/groups will compete. The winner doesn't receive a prize but their career is furthered by all of the publicity. This list is my top 11 acts for Eurovision

Saturday, March 19, 2011

Ensemble cast

I love musicals. I love the stage productions and sometimes the movie adaptations of musicals. The one flaw with large stage productions is the fact that they're always ensembles. Most of the time the casting is done right but of course there is always one or two that are off. For example, the 25th anniversary of Les Misérables. Nick Jonas, he is über distracting because he is not at the level of the other performers. He is a pop singer. Admittedly his performance wasn't bad, but put against the others he was definitely the weakest link. He has the least control, least training, and looked like he was in constant pain while he sang. Plus, he tried to have a British accent, which was hit and miss and dreadful. He did his best and it was obvious, so props to him. Still half the people in the chorus were better then he was. When he is singing towards the end and incredibly emotional song, "Empty Chairs at Empty Tables", it's the lyrics that grab you not the performance. *sigh* Oh well, moving on to bigger and better things.

The Broadway production of Hairspray the musical had a good ensemble; however, the original Tracy was not to my liking. She was a bit shrieky and just overall not that good. Nikki Blonsky in the movie production was much better.

Lets talk Phantom. The movie was pitiful. Sad, bad, horrible, and all around disappointing. Gerard Butler did a good job as Phantom, but he was no Micheal Crawford. Emmy Rossum was a good Christine, but again Sarah Brightman was way way better. Patrick Wilson as Raoul was, in my opinion, as good as the original. Worst, Minnie Driver as Carlotta. She didn't do any of her own singing and she was extremely distracting and detracted from the whole thing. She is a good actor, but her performance was weak and laughable. Jennifer Ellison as Meg was brilliant and Miranda Richardson as Mme. Giry was incredible; in fact, she may have been the best part of the movie.

The best ensemble cast in a movie ever, that I've seen, is the 1973 movie production of Jesus Christ Superstar. Not one of the best musicals of all time but not one of the worst either. Ever single person in that production was insanely good. Yvonne Elliman was an exceptional Mary Magdalene. See, I don't hate all ensemble cast. : p

Sunday, February 27, 2011

The way I treat me

This post is motivated by things my friends and family have mentioned to me.

I treat myself very differently then I treat my friends and family. I treat myself "worse" then I treat them: I can seem rather self-deprecating. I don't view the tendency to judge myself more critically and harsher then I judge other people as bad. For one thing, I'm me and you're you. Kinda obvious I know, but still that is the chief difference. Anyway, I know what and why I do things, what my motivation is, and the circumstances I'm in and have been in. You, not so much. I judge myself more harshly because I know that I have a tendency towards being conceited, self centered, and rather diva-ish. I use this system of self-critiquing as a way to check these harmful attributes of my personality. However, I do recognize when I make a major accomplishment and when I have success, but I don't wallow in self-praise. This may seem odd towards our very ego centric western society, yet it works well for me. I always remember there is room for improvement and growth. I do not believe there is such a thing as perfection; however, we should strive towards improvement of self. This is a fairly common concept in Eastern belief and philosophy. I think this ability to critique myself and use that critique to strive towards improvement comes from my four years of martial arts training. Admittedly, I'm not the best of martial artist (I have a lot of room for improvement) yet I'd like to think that I've learned how to implement many of the concepts taught by my instructors and the art itself.

In Tang Soo Do (my martial art) we have 7 tenets:
  1. Integrity
  2. Concentration
  3. Perseverance
  4. Respect and Obedience
  5. Self-Control
  6. Humility
  7. Indomitable Spirit
These 7 tenets mean this to me: Integrity - no matter what, I must remember that I have value and that people have placed value in me and that I must not disappoint them or myself, Concentration - I must focus on what I'm doing at that moment and it's outcome, Perseverance - ok, in the words of the Cobra Kai "never give up, never surrender," only applied to self improvement and improvement of technique etc, Respect and Obedience - there is always someone who is better then me at something, this means that in some way everyone is my superior; therefore, deserving respect I give obedience to those that are in leadership over me, Self-control - not smacking down that person that just really pissed me off, Humility - know that no matter how good I get I can always improve, Indomitable Spirit - always getting up and continuing to fight and improve no matter what.

We also have 14 attitude requirements. Most are very long so I'll include the three that most apply to this blog entry: 3 - All out effort: everything gets 100%, 8 - Do not be overly ambitious: basically don't try and learn black belt techniques at white belt, and 9 - Frequently inspect your own achievements: this shows where I can improve and where I have made progress.

Atop all 21 of our other core philosophical concepts are 5 codes:
  1. Loyalty to country
  2. Obedience to parents/ instructors and seniors
  3. Honor friendship
  4. No retreat in battle
  5. In fighting choose with sense and honor
4 and 5 get interpreted a little more abstractly now; such as, being applied to school work and personal struggles as opposed to their literal definition.

I have been surrounded by these philosophical concepts for four years and had to study them and know what they mean and how they are applied to my life and my art. They have become an integral part of my character. If you ever wondered how people functioned without a god inscribing in stone what they should and shouldn't do, these 26 concepts are good evidence. There is no god punishing those who do not implement these concepts properly or rewarding them if they do. There is only the pride of their family and themselves. This is trained into us at my Dojang (Korean term for Karate school): we make our instructors proud, our families proud, and ourselves proud when we do right. We dishonor the afore mentioned people when we do bad. This shame principal is pretty much nonexistent in modern protestant cultures. I feel that this system is superior because it has immediate determinable results: someone shows they are displeased with some action now as opposed to some abstract future date. In the end, I'm different. I need to do different things to be a better person and improve myself.